 | Part 2 My memory was getting worse by the day. (Remember from part 1: the future isn't easy to recall when you're already in the past. Things get... hazy.) ...but I made sure to lock 2 words in my head before I completely forgot what happened in the future: much grock. Something about much grock was big bearish and it was coming soon! All I had to do was hold onto my money until much grock and everything would be fine. Sometimes things don't go your wayIt's now weeks later and much grock never happened. Not only that, but BTC had now proceeded to rip $200 a new butthole and fly straight to $1,200! "WHY WON'T YOU STOP(!)" I yelled at my brand new iPhone5. I went from having enough BTC to trade for over $2.7M USD to only having enough cash to buy 150 BTC. "I don't think I can take this anymore!" FOMO"Is this when it goes to $2K!?" $2K and $20K had gotten mixed up in my head. "If I don't have any rooting interest, I'm boned! What if it goes to $2K then $1.3K on the dip!? I have to buy!" I did what I felt I had to do and bought as many BTC as I could. I still had that 2021 $100K number in my head... I knew everything would be okay: 150 x $100,000 is more money than I've ever known, by leaps and bounds! "I might not become a billionaire but it'll definitely get me to $150M." (I told you, I'm not very good at math. "The numbers get all squished up in my brain and don't come out no good". (Always Sunny reference not cited.)) A couple weeks later, it was an absolute bloodbath! BTC almost hit the other tree fiddy: $350! "OMG, no! Is this the same timeline? Is it going to zero?" I panicked but my lettuce hands turned to diamonds. "I'm not freakin leaving!" (WallWolf ref not cited.) I held on for dear life and watched it surge all the way back to 4 figures! "This is it! I'm going to be fine!" That, of course, was a local top and soon my diamond hands started looking attractive to the rabbits outside. By the time it hit $750, I said "I'm out!" This time, though, I got the feeling that everything would work out. I knew it would all be okay. I also knew BTC would keep dipping. I didn't know why but I was confident. "Much grock" started repeating in my head. Something was guiding me, telling me that a dip was coming. I went to my favorite exchange and deposited 20% of the money I had left after the $750 sales and got ready to buy the much grock dip! Much GrockIt was February 23rd, 2014 and I had just woken up from a nice slumber. The birds were chirping, the air was crisp. I could almost taste the sweet summer air on that winter morning. It wouldn't be long before the beautiful babies (Swingers ref... look, we all know I'm not citing there... "don't make me tap the sign..." (ref...)) and their tank tops and short shorts would be visible on every street corner. (Being a married man, I of course have no interest in any of it. I'm only looking for ideas on what to buy the wife. ... What? You don't believe me?) Look at those shoulder straps! So nice! I opened my MacBook and went to check the prices. My plan had worked out perfectly! Bitcoin had stabilized at about $600 and I thought "now is the time!" I bought all the BTC I could and sent in another 30% of the total, leaving me 50% sidelined, ready to buy the next dip with! I was really doing it. It was exhilarating! I had 94 Bitcoin and still had $56K to play with! I went to sleep that night with the biggest grin on my face. I had won. The market couldn't beat me. Time travel had made me a winner! Like a big toasty cinnamon bun The next day, I woke up and repeated the steps of the day before. "Why jinx it? Don't take any chances." When I was done breathing in the sweet smell of victory, I logged on and... "Where'd it go?" The exchange page was blank. "There must be some network issue. Maybe they forgot to pay their electricity bill bahaha." I had to get to work and I knew that the exchange would send out an email if there was a problem. I had a busy day ahead of me and I forgot about the blank screen until the evening. I came home from work and got on Reddit to see if the problem was only on my end. F!!!"No! It's not real. How could this happen!? WHERE ARE MY BITCOIN???" The coins were gone. / Part 2 [link] [comments] |
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